An afternoon miniparty in Bangkok

The so-called arrow of time refers to the one-way direction or asymmetry of time, which leads to the way we instinctively perceive time as moving forwards from the fixed and immutable past, though the present, towards the unknown and unfixed future. This idea has it roots in physics, particularly in the Second Law of Thermodynamics, although other, often related, arrows of time have also been identified. From ‘Exactly What is Time?’.. here.

I started thinking about this miniature party idea back in Phnom Penh, 2015?, 2016?, when was that. It was at a time when I realized that the bigger parties (which I organized, since I don’t attend other people’s parties, generally) just weren’t ‘doing it’ for me. When there were more than four or six people, no. I was tired of the whole ‘mingling’ thing. So what about a miniparty? The first one was in Phnom Penh, just six or seven if you count me in the mix. So fun. Then I did it in Riga. There were three of us, then four for a short moment, then three again. Such is how it goes now. Commitment-averse and highly distracted. Anyway. Let me bring it back to me. Haha.

For some reason, my own parties that got out of hand made me feel, on the one hand exhilarated because I love a good get-together and you can usually find one or two people you an really talk to when there are a dozen or more, but its harder when there are fewer, so yeah, there was that, and then I realized, well, I’m the only one I need to make happy at these parties… most peopel flake out anyway so who really cares about designing ‘space’ for them to have fun. I mean really. It’s my jam. So I reduced the number of tickets and sometimes even gave them away, and sometimes just bought drinks for people as a way to mix things up, by intention. Who wants to go to a party of ‘like-minded people?’ That is so ridiculous, to me. I love the mix. There is room for more of this in 2021 as people grapple with their own echochambereques thinking that has gotten the world into a tunnel of ‘don’t get it, don’t recognize myself in it, don’t care.’ Not only is it bad form for designing things that actually can be very interesting, it’s just… dull. Any group that doesn’t work on trying to get more of a range of voices together is, to me, uninteresting. I’m thinking a lot about that, lately. I’m offline and online in equal weights, now. So I can see it better, more clearly, I mean, where you see that people are clumping together because they feel like they can ‘get behind something together.’ What is the thing? Mostly, insecurity clouded over is the thing.

Not my jam.

This was.

Had a great time at this little spot, in Bangkok, after setting things up from Latvia on my way back to Asia and wondering if it would be cool to try to mix it up, in Thailand. It was. We had five guests, total. A couple that I already knew one half of, and some other from the internet invitation posted to Eventbrite. I like the idea of someone just discovering about things I make, and saying, sure, I’m in town, why not? That’s why it works. And is so self-selective. And also, so infrequent, too. It’s hard to show up. But showing up counts; and you never know what it might lead to. In this case, a splendid afternoon at this little spot…

 

… with the people who made the new cafe getting excited to have new guests. We were dispersing, of course, to different continents from there, but the idea of the just once, just now, and let’s make the most of it… that vibe. That’s why these moments are so intriguing, for me, to design for. And. Where. Time. Stops.

For a bit, anyway.

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